Scared Shitless

So, I didn't get to make the trip to Washington for work like I had hoped. Even though I am disappointed, I'm not altogether that surprised. I knew they'd never send me. Instead, my supervisor is going as well as our head honcho's right hand man. They're both very knowledgeable on the material but I know I would have made a perfect addition to the trip. No I'm not trying to toot my own horn but, I've put lots of sweat and hours into learning my way through that system, figuring out short cuts, things that will help us be more efficient. I know that system more than the people who use it on a daily basis and SHOULD learn to make it work for them, yet I guess that's not enough.

To make things worse, like any other company, ours is taking precautions and adjusting with these hard economic times. Our salaries were frozen and our evaluations were put on hold. Yes, January was my anniversary date and the time I should have had my evaluation. A month later, no eval, no raise. Excellent.

The great thing about this situation is, they're very open to shifting people around to accomodate open positions or those that are about to open due to people who are not up to par in performance. This is where I come in. I had already shown interest in two other departments and am being considered. As much as I love my department, I'm ready for this, ready to give my all to another part of my beloved company. The only other thing is, so is another girl.

She's been here twice as long as I have, is considered one of the best employees in the company yet has no motivation to do anything other than her assigned job, even as she's being offered higher positions within the company. Now that there's a shadow hanging over our jobs, she seems to show interest in other departments. I can't say that I know for a fact that it's because there's a threat of unemployment thick in the air, but, it makes me uneasy.

I'm not afraid, I know what I can offer. I just wish others would step up and show what they're REALLY made of.